Traveling to new locations is a pretty regular occurrence in our family. We are always planning, scheming, adventuring to a new location, and if we are idle for too long, we get antsy.
So, I understand the wanderlust. I embrace it and encourage it to everyone I know. But still, something happens to me when my husband goes off on an adventure without us. The days before he leaves for a trip, I get nervous, anxious, and even a bit weepy because I know that the adventures that he embarks on alone are a bit more risky than our family jaunts. Although he always errs on the side of caution and is a real pro at risk assesment, I know that the danger of the elements and the outdoors can be a match for the most seasoned outdoorsman. And, I know that shit happens to the safest people. People get hurt out there. And, when the person about to head out into the wilderness is the person that means the most to you in this world…well, it can make your stomach a bit queasy.
I get the question pretty often from my friends and family…why do you LET him go so often? Why do you let him go on these trips, when they are dangerous/you have to stay home with the kids/they cost money etc. etc. etc….
The answer to every single one of those questions is; because I know that this is what fulfills him. Sure, he is the most incredible husband, father, friend (Jack Pearson ain’t got nothin’ on my Matthew) and all of these things are what are the most important to him. But, when he summits that new mountain, when he pushes himself to train for a more difficult expedition, when he rides that fresh powder, it adds a light to his eyes that only those that are adventure chasers might understand. He speaks of the mountains with reverence, and I know that experiencing new ones makes him truly happy. And, his happiness is one of my own priorities (as I know that mine is one of his).
So, I let him go.
I kiss him deeply before he leaves and wish him love, safety and fun. The entire time he’s gone, I wait for the occasional “it’s all good” call or a message from his In Reach Satellite to put my heart at ease. I throw some good vibes up to the universe and hope that the mountain is kind to him until he returns to us. And, shortly after he unpacks his bags and give the kids their souvenirs, the maps come back out, more plane tickets are booked and a new adventure will soon begin…
xo Elisa Rispoli